Christian Single / Part Nine: Worse Than Single

Is there anything worse than being single? Yeah. Yeah, there is. I’m sure you can think of some things including people in your lives who have struggled and suffered. Actually, you know what’s far worse than being single? Being so obsessed over being single that you ignore the love God is offering you right now. That’s just downright tragic. I wish I could say it’s all you ever need, and in some ways it is — but God knows some of us need more. Be patient, He just has some timing to work out.

So spend this time discovering the person you want to be. Enjoy your education, your career. Get your bank account healthy. Prepare strong friendships and strengthen your family ties. Read your bible. Spend this time enjoying the person you are. Have adventures. Enjoy your friends. Be confident. Be comfortable. Have fears. Trust God.

I want you to know I’m not writing this because I have all the answers. This series is as much for myself as it is anyone else. It’s a reminder that there are scientific things you can do to be happier, singleness is not meant to be hurtful, and you are not alone.

The lie is that you cannot be single or secure on your own. You can, you will. Of course that doesn’t mean it doesn’t suck sometimes. Okay, a lot. Because it does. But singleness isn’t punishment. It’s a state of preparedness — even if you’re not preparing for marriage.

On the great show Forever (2014) there is a flashback where the main character is in jail and meets a priest who waves off the reason he’s in jail with a simple line, “That’s my sentence… but it’s not my story.” How powerful. Singleness may be your sentence but it’s not your story. You are so much more than your statusdom. I need you to know that.

Okay. Let’s recap.

How do you decide to be a happy single? You work at it. From Shawn Achor we learned the science of happiness — write down at least one thing you’re thankful for every day, pray, and do things for others. Some days you put down Facebook and walk away. Other times, you post that selfie because you did that thing and it was bomb. Spend time with people who are married, divorced, and single. Don’t make an idol of marriage. Know thyself. Go out and do things. You just can’t know the future. Be tenacious. Your Heavenly Father loves you.

Now let’s get on the saintly armor, verses of love from your Heavenly Father that are nothing to do with singleness and everything to do with wholeness.

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